Podcasts
Garden of Grace
Reports:
STEWARDSHIP AND FINANCE REPORT: April 30-May 2, 2007, St. Simons Island, Georgia. Report by Richard A Kiraly, Lay Delegate, GOGUCC and Southest Conference.
Saint Simon’s island was an excellent experience of fellowship and learning in a beautiful retreat setting. For the fellowship: the invaluable sharing of ideas about what other congregations are doing to inspire connectedness, fundraising, community outreach. For the stewardship, there were the workshops and forums.
An accounting of my time:
Monday April 30, 2007
Registration and Supper were first on the agenda (4:30pm-6:15pm)
Welcome and Introductions (6:15pm-6:45pm)
Opening Worship (6:45pm-7:30pm) – we heard from Stephen Camp, Conference Minister
Bible Study (7:30pm-8:45pm)– Rick and Jill Edens of United Church of Chapel Hill, NC
Ice Cream Social
(I skipped the Ice Cream (but not the social) because I had the opportunity to speak in-depth personally with Mark Suriano about the upcoming UCC General Synod. Mark is a selected delegate from his conference, attending the Synod. We spoke about the resolutions on the program about retraction of the Marriage Equality Resolution passed at the last Synod. He stated that there are always “conservative” movements like those from “conservative” churches, and that he considered it “highly unlikely” that such resolutions as these two would ever make it to the floor. He also stated that at the General Synod, committees of delegates were formed to give audience to such resolutions and that those committees had powers of revision and veto, and were therefore unlikely to support such a “conservative, un-UCC-like” resolution to even make it to the floor. Mark reminded me the Puerto Rican conference left the denomination recently, citing the Marriage Resolution as their major reason. He said that it seemed evident that the UCC would rather stand firm on their Marriage Resolution act rather than capitulate to their demands. I was comforted by this discussion and wanted to share it with my congregation.)
Tuesday May 1, 2007
Conference Caucuses over Breakfast (8am-9am)– a gathering of churches within our Conference in which we discussed issues affecting our churches and our conference relating to stewardship.
Morning Prayers (9am-9:15a)
Testimony and Bible Study (9:15am-10am) part one of a 3-part study of sermon/bible-based campaign for stewardship – in which they incorporated bible readings and sermons to pave the way for stewardship giving. We also heard testimony from Tracy Carnes, a member who had felt the connection and been inspired to stewardship.
Break (10am-10:15am)
Testimony and Plenary Appreciative Inquiry Meets Stewardship (10:15am-12pm) – we heard from Mark Suriano, a pastor of Old South Church in Kirtland OH, in which he discussed the book Memories, Hopes and Conversations (Branson, M) and his own churches journey through the Appreciative Inquiry process. Please see my notes on this session.
Lunch and Conference Sharing/Planning (12pm-1pm) – discussions and sharing over lunch about thoughts on stewardship.
Workshops (1pm – 2pm) of the four choices (“Stewardship, Evangelism and Vital Churches,” “The Magi Project,” “Year-round Stewardship,” and “Environmental Stewardship”), I chose to attend the “Environmental Stewardship” workshop. Please see my notes on this workshop.
Kilowatt Ours (2pm-2:35pm) an impromptu screening of Kilowatt Ours, an environmental film focused on the Southeast portion of the United States.
Free Time (2:35pm-5:30pm) We were allowed to leave the property and venture out. Carolyn and I did a little window-shopping and visited the St. Simons Island Lighthouse. Please note that I featured much of the photos I took on St. Simons Island in the worship service on May 6, 2007 and in subsequent worship services as well.
Supper and Sharing Good News (5:30pm-6:30pm)
Conference Caucuses (6:30pm-7pm) we were asked to fairly represent our Conference in each of the workshops and report on those workshops in this caucus so that the other members could benefit from the highlights.
Bible Study (7pm-7:45pm) part-two of 3-part study of sermon/bible-based campaign for stewardship
Plenary Where Would I Be Without The UCC? (8pm-8:45pm) testimony from various members of the UCC about how the UCC had affected their lives.
Evening Prayer and Ice Cream Social (8:45pm)
(Skipping the Ice Cream, I again had the opportunity to speak personally with Mark Suriano and we spoke further about his experiences in in the UCC. Mark and his partner have been together over ten years. Marks background prior to the UCC was as a Priest in the Catholic Church. His congregation is somewhat “conservative,” but recruited him as a pastor anyway. It is always a good thing to hear from others within the denomination as a gauge of how the UCC treats its GLBT members. I, nor Mark, as he stated, have never been made to feel uncomfortable in the UCC – it truly seems to be a denomination that “walks the walk” of No Matter Who You Are Or Where You Are On Life’s Journey, You Are Welcome Here.”)
Wednesday May 2, 2007
Breakfast (8am-8:30am)
Conference Caucuses (8:30am-9am) – a discussion of future opportunities to gather the Conference together for educational and fellowship.
Morning Prayer (9am-9:05am)
Bible Study (9:05am-9:35am) – part-three of a 3-part study of sermon/bible-based campaign for stewardship
Break (9:35am-9:45am)
Open Discussion with Mark Suriano (9:45am-10am) – an impromptu session of final questions and open discussion on Appreciative Inquiry (AI)
Taking It Home (10am-11am) in which they gave us numerous “freebies” of stewardship literature which I am passing on to the Team of Trustees via Pastor Andy
Closing Worship (11am-12pm)
Lunch (12pm-)
IDEAS (from various portions of the meetings):
Harvest Dinner – themed dinner with a per-plate donation – stewardship fundraiser
Fall Fest – a variety of “Fall” themed activities, such as potluck, games, fundraisers – in essence a festival event open to all.
Meal Ministry in which members of the church go out into the community to feed members unable to attend or non-members in need of care and compassion.
Establish a Partnership and Outreach Committee, a team engaged in involving business, spiritual and community relationships with other churches, organizations, businesses and individuals for the purpose of furthering our mission and vision.
Community Scrapbook: Draw from sermons, Care Circle gatherings, fundraising events, community events, and congregational events for pictures and quotable quotes – assemble a community scrapbook that reveals who we are and where we are on this spiritual journey.
APPRECIATIVE INQUIRY
If I heard one message above all else, it is the message that we need to know our congregation from their perspective, and a great way to do that is through a discernment process referred to as AI (Appreciative Inquiry). It is an interview process with the members of the congregation in which they are given an opportunity to discuss how they FEEL about their church, what cherished memories about their church that cause those feelings, and their own goals and visions for the direction of the church.
We heard a great deal from a gay pastor in Ohio, Mark Suriano, who spoke on his experiences with Appreciative Inquiry in his own church. He refers to and recommends a book, Memories, Hopes, and Conversations – Appreciative Inquiry and Congregational Change. It should be noted that many pastors felt they had conducted a similar process in their own churches, but had done so with a specific purpose and thereby slanted the results (such as, do we affiliate, disaffiliate; do we remodel or build new; etc.). The only goal of Appreciative Inquiry should be discernment from the membership on what it means to be (Garden of Grace UCC).
Appreciative Interviews give voice to members, illuminate wishes and wants for the spiritual direction of our church. They focus on feelings and memories and might give light to members’ perception of what our church’s responsibilities are outside our church doors. Recapture the values that make our church vital – what brings us all together?
Martin Luther King: in what I hope is a respectfully accurate quote: “Too often a church is a taillight, rather than a headlight,” – invite discussion and conversation for enlightenment.
I am recommending that book to Pastor Andy and Assistant Pastor Candace for their careful consideration. I also recommend that they contact Mark Suriano pastor@oldsouthchurch.org for further reference.
ENGAGING OUR MEMBERSHIP
As a Lay Delegate for Garden of Grace UCC, I made every effort to voice the GLBT perspective through conversations with other congregation leaders and UCC leaders. I also used the fellowship opportunities to get a feel for ideas-that-work in other congregations. Here are some great ideas, some of which we already do (to a degree) and some of which we might benefit greatly from:
A) Inspire Connectedness: Post photos of church members engaged in fellowship activities: inspires a sense of belonging; is more inviting to newcomers; puts a face on the membership. (we used to have a collage of photos in our entrance on Belleview – can we renew this effort?) Note: utilizing member photos and photos of our community efforts in websites, bulletins and within the church itself – think about when you visit someone’s home, or even your own home – do you see pictures on the wall of the house you are in, or the people that live there? Procedural Considerations: Obtain appropriate permissions from members for use of likeness, etc.; Develop a permission form and distribute for this purpose.
B) Encourage Fellowship: Screen films that are mission/vision oriented, such as environmental films (Inconvenient Truth, Kilowatt Ours, etc.) to enhance fellowship experience. Note: for dinners, luncheons, potlucks, etc., set up large tables for everyone to sit together. Procedural Considerations: Advertise the event publicly to enhance public knowledge of our mission and values, introduce people to our church.
C) Value Gifts and Talents: Feature member talents and gifts through various programs (i.e. the already suggested interviews with members (utilized on website, newsletter); Enhance the Minister of the Month program to include details of contributions to the church and community; Invite “testimony” in service on “Why I belong…”)
D) Committees and Task Forces: Allows interaction among members for a specific goal or passion: suggestions – meet and greet community at events (such as Pride, Business Guild events); Small scale fundraiser with a specific project in mind (new stove, new computer, new furniture, etc.); Community Outreach program (feed hungry, community dance, Habitat For Humanity, etc.)
ENVIRONMENTAL STEWARDSHIP Forum:
It is my impression that Garden of Grace UCC is already an environmentally aware body of faith, and so I felt it was important to attend the Environmental Stewardship forum offered. And, of course, it is something that is of keen interest to me personally, too!
The presentation was from an organization called Interfaith Power and Light, an organization that works with many different churches across many denominations to spread knowledge on environmental concerns, develop programs for churches who wish to be environmentally friendly, and help churches fight environmental issues.
I was astounded to find out the kind of environmental issues churches within our denomination were already struggling with – such as mountaintop removal, water contamination, forest clear-cutting, etc. Most of the churches represented within the room (including Garden of Grace) were already involved in efforts to reduce electricity consumption (motion sensor light switches, CFLs, solar-paneling), planting trees/plants, recycling, etc.
“All this belongs to God.”
Ideas:
Screening of films, such as “An Inconvenient Truth,” “Kilowatt Ours,” etc. Yet another excuse to bring community together – can be publicly advertised through cooperation with other local churches who share in the cost of advertising and other expenses – helps increase a churches exposure to the greater community, strengthens relationships between local churches, and enhances fellowship opportunities.
Earth Day / Tree-Planting: Not just for Earth Day anymore – plant trees as an activity of barbecues, potlucks, play-days, recreational events, gardening events, etc. – members can donate trees and even dedicate trees, and enhance garden efforts.
Facilitate Recycling Efforts: churches can be a collection point for recycling of hard to recycle items, such as light bulbs (if someone is replacing incandescent with Compact Fluorescent Lightbulbs, the bulbs can be donated to Public Housing projects, Recycling Plants, or organizations like Habitat For Humanity), batteries, etc.
Low-Carbon Diet 30 day program to lose 5,000 carbon “lbs” in daily life of individual or group – such as fuel-consumption, electricity-consumption, etc.
Replace Incandescent with Compact Fluorescent Lightbulbs (CFL) – bulbs are now available in “dimmer-capable,” floodlamps, and odd-size and odd-shaped varieties. Savings on utilities is a key benefit, as well as a significant reduction in dependence on electricity from nuclear and coal-burning electric generating facilities (can be done in the church building(s) and in individual member homes)
Education and Outreach make environmental literature available to church members and visitors, include environmental education articles in websites and bulletins
Fundraising – instead of (or in addition to) selling candy, cookies – sell CFLs! Also, sell Fair Trade products, such as coffee.
Activities: Educational Classes, Energy Audits/Improvements, worship services-liturgy, setting goals, footprints
Resources:
Although this information was not discussed at St. Simons Island Stewardship and Finance meeting, I was asked by a few members to discuss with the Conference recent events surrounding Sex Offenders and the UCC.
First, please find my inquiry to Dr. Downs (via e-mail). Next, please find Dr. Downs reply. Finally, please find a reprint of an article from the UNION-TRIBUNE (not affiliated with the UCC or GOGUCC).
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Garden of Grace [mailto:gardenofgraceucc@yahoo.com]
Sent: Wednesday, April 04, 2007 3:47 PM
To: Timothy Downs
Subject: Re: UCC Sex Offender Article
Dr. Downs,
Several members of our congregation have approached me with questions about UCC's official position on this current event (see article). Of course, I advised those members that UCC was a congregational denomination, and that the position of one church is not necessarily the position of UCC. I would like to respond to their questions further, but seek your advice before I do. It was suggested that I ask this question at the meeting in Charleston , but, while it may make for a lively debate, perhaps it would be easier to get a concise answer by e-mail instead.
--In Christ,
Richard Kiraly, Lay Delegate
Garden of Grace UCC
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From:
"Timothy Downs" <tdowns@secucc.org>
To:
"'Garden of Grace'" <gardenofgraceucc@yahoo.com>
Subject:
RE: UCC Sex Offender Article
Date:
Thu, 5 Apr 2007 09:45:12 -0400
Richard,
This article and your questions about policies in the UCC around issues of convicted sexual offenders are all very timely, and many of us have engaged these issues valuing the safety of our children, and the personhood and dignity of the alleged offender, and of course the terrible pain that these situations unleash for so many. The United Church Insurance Board has well developed guidelines for making our churches safe places, which means that all staff and volunteers working with children should be subject to background checks and disclosure. If you are interested, I can get those to you.
In matters of dealing with clergy ethics, we are very clear with our authorized ministers what is appropriate and inappropriate sexual activity, and typically in cases of the potential sexual victimization of children by ministers is reported to the appropriate settings under the laws of the state, and there is a suspension of a minister upon learning of the allegation and a review for fitness for ministry is engaged.
In matters where I have had to deal with allegation of pedophile I have urged church to exercise compassion for all, but as I noted in the article the congregations did, to welcome the offender, with careful supervision and clear boundaries particularly when around children and youth. I would not recommend that someone with a sexual history with children be engaged in youth ministry.
I hope this information is helpful to you.
Tim Downs
Timothy C. Downs, Conference Minister
Southeast Conference, United Church of Christ
1330 West Peachtree Street, Suite 344
Atlanta, GA 30309
1-800-807-1993
404-607-1993
www.secucc.org
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Carlsbad church struggling with child molester's presence
By Sandi Dolbee
UNION-TRIBUNE STAFF WRITER
March 14, 2007
DAN TREVAN / Union-Tribune
The Rev. Madison Shockley, pastor of Carlsbad 's Pilgrim United Church of Christ, calls this a teachable moment.
On a Sunday morning in late January, the Rev. Madison Shockley reminded his congregation at Pilgrim United Church of Christ of the New Testament story in which Jesus stops a crowd from stoning an adulterer.
Whoever is without sin should throw the next stone, Jesus tells the people, and the crowd disperses.
Then Shockley introduced Mark Pliska, who had been attending the Carlsbad church for a few weeks. Pliska told the crowd his story, that he was a convicted child molester.
Pliska left and Shockley opened up the service to comments.
And that opened a firestorm of emotion, dredging up memories of child abuse from several adult members and creating a debate over safety versus inclusiveness. Suddenly, a liberal, progressive church that prided itself on being welcoming to all people was struggling with what that really meant.
“You have people who feel passionately, faithfully and very differently,” Shockley said.
Tensions ran so high in the church, which draws about 150 adults and 30 children on Sunday mornings, that Shockley “very reluctantly” asked Pliska to stop coming to services – at least temporarily – while questions could be sorted out.
Tears welled up as the pastor recounted the conversation. “Nothing in my almost 30 years of ministry has prepared me to turn somebody away,” he said.
When the church's preschool heard about Pliska, both from the service and later from a letter from the church, one of the parents was so outraged that she began a petition drive in protest.
“It's not appropriate to have him there,” said Jessica Muehlhausen of Vista . It doesn't matter to Muehlhausen that the preschool isn't open on Sundays or that her family does not attend the church. What matters to her is the risk.
“Mark Pliska has a right to worship,” she said. “He just needs to find an appropriate church that isn't attached to a children's center.”
Shockley said Pliska has since been evicted from his home and lost his job as a mechanic.
The pastor blames publicity and has stopped using his name. Muehlhausen blames Pliska. “People who commit crimes like this against children have this coming to them,” she said.
Pliska, 53, could not be reached for comment. According to authorities, he was convicted in 1983 in Mendocino County of molesting two boys under 14 and of indecent exposure in 1998 in Monterey County . He was released last year from Atascadero State Hospital in San Luis Obispo County and is a registered sex offender.
After moving to Santa Cruz , Pliska approached First Congregational Church, which like Pilgrim Church is part of the United Church of Christ denomination. “He was looking for a different future,” said the Rev. Heather Dillashaw.
Dillashaw said Pliska was open about his past, which is something he didn't have to do. “No church that I know of has a sign at the door that says, 'Please disclose your criminal history before you walk in,' ” she said.
The leadership wrestled with his request for several weeks. She said opinions ranged from “no possible way” to “how could we not.”
Eventually, he was allowed to attend after agreeing to a strict set of rules, which ranged from staying away from children to never being on campus unaccompanied. Parents also were informed.
“He agreed very readily to all those things,” Dillashaw said.
He attended for about seven months without incident, she said. Late last year, Pliska decided to move to San Diego County , and Dillashaw helped him find Pilgrim Church , which was near where he'd be living. She sent an e-mail to Shockley, introducing Pliska, telling about his past and explaining how her church handled it.
Shockley met with Pliska, who began attending services at the end of December. Using the Santa Cruz model, Shockley had him sign a limited-access agreement and assembled a team of escorts.
The pastor also wanted the entire church to know. “Those of us who had met him found that a humanizing experience,” he said. “Part of our naiveté thought it would be a humanizing experience for everyone.”
Pilgrim isn't the only church wondering whether protection trumps forgiveness or where theology ends and reality begins.
The Rev. Debra Haffner, director of the Religious Institute on Sexual Morality, Justice and Healing in Norwalk , Conn. , said she works with an average of one to two congregations a month who are struggling with similar issues.
Shockley also has turned to Haffner for advice. He has purchased several copies of her book, “A Time to Heal: Protecting Children and Ministering to Sex Offenders,” and the two spoke on the telephone yesterday about Pilgrim's situation.
“They are trying with integrity to come up with a policy and a process that will both keep young people safe and see if there is a way to minister to this individual,” Haffner said afterward.
She is impressed with Pliska's willingness to disclose his past. But, she added, “Nobody is talking about unlimited access to congregational life.”
An offender cannot go to church like other people, said Greg Sporer, co-founder of Keeping Kids Safe Ministries in Smyrna , Tenn. Like Haffner, he recommends that the person sign an agreement to abide by specific rules.
Sporer said the regulations need to be detailed, right down to bathroom privileges. “He can't just walk into a restroom at a church. He's got to make sure there are no children.”
He also advocates that the person meet regularly with a church sponsor. “You've got to know if they're praying to God or preying on kids,” Sporer said.
Haffner's mantra is for congregations to work out a general policy before a crisis hits. The policy then should be tailored to each individual.
She stresses that it's the abusers people aren't aware of who pose the most danger. The known ones can be monitored, she said.
Deputy District Attorney Phyllis Shess agreed. “The biggest tool offenders have is secrecy,” said Shess, director of Sex Offender Management for the San Diego County District Attorney's Office.
Her advice: Know who you are dealing with. The state's sex offender registry is public information (Web site: meganslaw.ca.gov).
What advice does she have for Pilgrim? “How much people decide to open up their churches or themselves to these people is really an individual decision,” Shess said. “Some of us are more openhearted than others, but I would just urge whoever is going to do that to not just do that with open hearts but with eyes wide open.”
Because the United Church of Christ is structured as a democracy, it will be up to the Pilgrim congregation to decide whether Pliska is allowed to worship there.
“I'm trusting this process,” Shockley said.
A church team continues to meet with Pliska. “He's accepted it with grace,” Shockley said. “He's missing coming to church.”
Shockley also is working with his congregation to develop a “safe-church” policy.
“The thing that really, really caught me off guard was the number of people in my congregation with a history of child abuse,” Shockley said. “I was stunned.”
Despite the pain, Shockley sees this as a teachable moment. “I hope everyone who reads this goes to their own church and says, 'Do we have a safe-church policy and if we don't, let's put one into place immediately.' ”
The sign outside Pilgrim, at Chestnut Avenue and Monroe Street , says that “All are welcome.”
Even convicted child molesters?
It's a question yet to be answered. “This is one of those learn-as-you-go situations,” said the pastor.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This report is respectfully submitted this 6th day of May, 2007, from your Lay Delegate,
Richard A Kiraly
Garden of Grace United Church of Christ
1020 Atlas Rd. , Columbia , SC 29209
http://www.gogucc.com
"No Matter Who You Are, Or Where You Are On Life's Journey, You Are Welcome Here."